Sex is good, but not all are spiritually, emotionally, and physically healthy. That is important to understand before we delve into the next part of The Jesus Way. In several ways, understanding God’s desires for the sexual part of our life is like understanding the difference between eating well and being a glutton. If we eat well, it is healthy and nourishing. If we eat poorly, either through over-indulgence or overdoing unhealthy foods, it is detrimental to our health and well-being (even if it is momentarily deliciously satisfying).
Jesus taught, “You have heard the commandment that says, ‘You must not commit adultery.’ But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart. So if your eye—even your good eye—causes you to lust, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. And if your hand—even your stronger hand—causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.” (Matthew 5:27–30, NLT)
Someone looking for loopholes may propose that Jesus was only talking to married folks. Adultery is defined as sexually breaking wedding vows. Not so fast, for other parts of the Biblical canon include the sinfulness of unmarried sex. Most in Jesus’ audience that day would have accepted the boundary that sinless sex is limited to the marriage bed.
Jesus takes it further as He did with murder. It’s not just the physical activity that gets you in trouble – it is even thinking about it. That is a very high bar, especially when the world leverages sexual images or suggestions in entertainment and advertising. I even leveraged that a bit with the first three words of this article.
Our imaginations are wonderful God-given gifts. It is a powerful gift that allows us to see things as though they were. Sound familiar? We don’t talk about it much, but there is a connection between imagination and faith. But like any gift, it can be abused. Jesus identified one such abuse in this passage when we look at someone other than our spouse and imagine “what it would be like.” So, Jesus’ words about looking with lust covers the gamut of possibilities – from secret longing to pornography.
And then Jesus takes things to the extreme by suggesting that it may be necessary to take over-the-top actions to combat this (and other) sin. Now, I don’t really believe Jesus meant for us to gouge out an eye or to hack off a limb. Because, after all, that still wouldn’t fix the heart problem. The question, though, is whether we are willing to take extreme measures to knowingly avoid the sin of adultery in thought or deed.
For someone addicted to porn, fasting from it may seem like someone poked their eye out. But that is what it takes to overcome that addiction. There are some addictions that folks overcome by weaning away from their indulgence. But there are other addictions that can only be overcome by going cold turkey and with the help of the Holy Spirit. Porn is one of those addictions. If you stumble in this area, get pastoral help.
Why does God care? Lust dehumanizes and objectifies another. It takes away their personhood as we, real or imagined, indulge our fantasies. Again, the Jesus Way is about relationships. Adultery breaks our spousal relationship and our relationship with God. Jesus’ teaching is not a control thing – it is a you thing. He cares for you; it is the Jesus Way.
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- The Legacy - April 15, 2024
God is the one who created sex for the purpose of reproduction. But outside marriage is adultery.