Parenting is the most valuable and overlooked investment we, as individuals, make. Most of us come to it unprepared; I know that I did. Sure, we read some books, took the good and bad of our own upbringing, and maybe observed a few things along the way. The Bible recognizes the importance of family. The Ten Commandments include honoring our father and mother along with the more dramatic “thou shall not’ proscriptions. The wisdom of Proverbs says, “Train up a child in the way he should go, Even when he grows older he will not abandon it.” (Proverbs 22:6, NASB 2020) But how? How do we fight the good fight of parenting? It’s a responsibility that shapes the future generation, and we are the ones entrusted with it.
That question is not directly answered in the Bible. There isn’t a book specifically addressing parenting. There are hints along the way. The wisdom of Proverbs and Ecclesiastics is directed at the young. Colossians instructs dads, “Fathers, do not antagonize your children, so that they will not become discouraged.” (Colossians 3:21, NASB 2020) But we’re still missing the how, other than the oft-quoted, “He who withholds his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him diligently.” (Proverbs 13:24, NASB 2020) But, there is a book of the Bible we can draw on for guidance on how to parent – 1st Timothy.
For this to make sense, we must see our family as an expression of the Church. In fact, that is what the family is. And we, as parents, are shepherding that church much like Timothy was shepherding the church of Ephesus. Our role as shepherds in the family is significant and valued. Granted, not every instruction of Paul to Timothy will apply to the family, but much does and it is worth exploring.
Paul begins his letter by setting a goal. Why is Paul writing? Why is Timothy leading the church? What is our goal as parents? Paul’s answered, “But the goal of our instruction is love from a pure heart, from a good conscience, and from a sincere faith.” (1 Timothy 1:5, NASB 2020) That is the guiding verse for Lambchow’s ministry. That is our goal in writing and instructing. It is also a worthy goal for the ministry of parenting.
Parenting is much more than something we fall into. It is much more than seeing that a child achieves adulthood. It is working with God to shape and form our children into whom God wants them to be. Most of all, parenting is the art of the release. Our goal is to let them lose on the world, able to be their God-driven selves. Like Paul stated, the goal of our parenting should be for our children to love from a pure heart, a good conscience, and a sincere faith.
The time between a child’s entry into our family (by birth, adoption, or fostering) and their entry into the world we could call The Good Fight of Faith (or simply The Good Fight). Paul uses that phrase later in his letter to Timothy to encourage him to keep at it. In context, Paul is talking about personal disciplines. However, fighting the good fight also works for parenting. You see, most of parenting is working on our attitudes, choices, and behaviors before guiding our children in the way they should go.
To wrap up. Consider your goals for yourself and your children, grandchildren, or other youngsters you may interact with. What do you really hope their lives will be like? What impact on their world do you desire them to have? What attitudes and motivations would you love to see them adopt? How do those goals align with love from a pure heart, a good (Clear) conscience, and a sincere faith?
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