Every generation of Christ-followers has struggled with this one thing. While the “hot” issue of the day has changed many times, the problem of navigating these rough waters is the same. These are the things that divide churches, families, and fellowships. This or that kind of choice with no nuance.
For instance, one age struggled with the relationship between church and state, another with the question of alcohol, and another with divorce. Most recently, the demands of LGBT+ voices have challenged all churches in some way. Churches have divided over these things and many other things as well.
One common refrain is the often repeated “hate the sin and love the sinner.” A phrase much maligned in recent years as anti-Biblical in some quarters. But is it? The answer to that question will also provide buoy markers to navigate the troubled seas of conflict.
So is there any Biblical support for “hate the sin and love the sinner?” I believe there is. Consider, for instance, “Let love be without hypocrisy. Detest evil; cling to what is good. Love one another deeply as brothers and sisters. Take the lead in honoring one another.” (Romans 12:9–10, CSB) These verses from Romans come in a section devoted to differences within the church body. They are not pointed at the church organization but at each of us as individual members of that body.
To love without hypocrisy, what does that mean? Be genuine and sincere in love. But don’t be blind or employ cheap grace. Truth is vital in loving without hypocrisy. So how can we love someone with an obvious sin(evil) in their life? Doesn’t their actions release us from love? No, it doesn’t. Keep reading.
Detest (hate, abhor) evil. Not just the evil we see in the world but the evil we see in one another. Paul doesn’t switch contexts; this is all about life in the body of Christ. And yes, Paul uses the very strong language of vehement dislike and repulsion of evil, about as opposite of love as you can get.
Consider this. If we can’t hate evil, there is no need for correction. But Paul expected correction in the body. Consider his instruction to Timothy, “Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; correct, rebuke, and encourage with great patience and teaching.” (2 Timothy 4:2, CSB) But here, we must also give room for the Holy Spirit to work in someone’s life. A rebuke out of season will cause bitterness and rejection, but one in season will bring repentance.
Cling to what is good. What are a person’s excellent moral qualities? Cleave (join) to those. A person can be an unabashed gossip(evil) and overflow with hospitality(good). Find the fingermarks of God in their life and relish them. In reality, this isn’t much different than parenting that rejects bad behavior and rewards good behavior, but always, no matter what, we love the child.
In all of this, there must be humility demonstrated by taking the lead to honor one another. None of us are without sin; some of our sins are just more culturally acceptable than others. But instead of looking to advance our status or position, we are to look for ways to recognize and honor God’s gift in each other.
We must prioritize love without forsaking the truth to navigate these troubled waters. We must look for the fingermarks of God in all, not just those who are most like us or whom we like most. Yes, we recognize the sin in others (and in ourselves), but we do so without judgment and condemnation. We instead pray and give room for the Holy Spirit to move mountains in their lives. Yes, it is messy, but Jesus told us it would be that way in a parable.
One of Jesus’ parables is called the Tares (weeds) and Wheat in Matthew 13:24-30. That parable begins, “He presented another parable to them: “The kingdom of heaven may be compared to a man who sowed good seed in his field.” (Matthew 13:24, CSB) In the story, an enemy comes and plants weeds in the wheat at night. Once it was discovered, the servants desired to pull the weeds, but the master of the field said no, you might also uproot the good plants. “Let both grow together until the harvest. At harvest time I’ll tell the reapers: Gather the weeds first and tie them in bundles to burn them, but collect the wheat in my barn.’ ” (Matthew 13:30, CSB) The time of reaping is not yet here, one day God will judge.
But there is one more consideration. While it is impossible for a tare or weed to become wheat, it is possible (even desired) for a sinner to become a child of God. I believe that Jesus demonstrated this with the woman caught in adultery, which ends with the threads, “neither do I condemn you” and “go, and sin no more.” (see John 8:11). Both of those threads must exist together with equal weight or the true picture of Jesus’ demonstration is lost.
Yes, love the sinner and hate the sin, but in an attitude of love with humility without judgment yet holding to the truth. For you see, “Hatred stirs up conflicts, but love covers all offenses.” (Proverbs 10:12, CSB)
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